Reflection in Poetry

Below is a poem created by Dance Artist Sarena in reflection of the HOMEbody process.

Home isn’t a place

It’s a feeling that swells inside of us 

When we’ve stopped living in longing.

When we switch the story from needing more

To having enough exactly as we are right now

And with this, a settling arrives,

The body begins to stop running marathons for the mind.

The body is granted the time and space to heal itself.

The heart beat slows

And you feel the soft rush of complacency

A tender sensation, like being caressed by someone you love.

To have a home, to be home

Are such separate entities

To be home, to feel home

Are worlds apart.

Who makes the walls that separate us from coming home?

My mind, my stories, my window, my world view, 

My thought patterns, my fears, my future projections

There are millions of ways to build walls

But the body won’t thank you

The soul won’t thank you

The spirit will long to be free from the cage you’ve built

Do we have the power

Right now. In this moment

To break down the walls and and speak a new story.

With this next breath.

“Inhale, I have arrived.

Exhale, I am home (thich nhat hanh).”

HOME in lanuguage

Virtual high fives and hugs and appreciation for your thoughts, words and reflections on HOME!

In a Facebook discussion, Michael Lancaster suggested that he and several other authors use my post, Defining HOME, as a writing prompt on PLACE and HOME.

See the comments on Defining HOME for some of Michael's written reflections.

In a group chat, Michael shared:
"Reflecting on Home, friend Becky Patterson who wrote The Ranch that Was Us, author Becky Patterson offered this poem as a touchstone for home"

As a researcher in this process, I've been gathering articles, stories, and artistic reflections that other folks (artists, writers, musicians, bloggers, news organizations, dancers, athletes, yogis...) have shared about home. I'll continue to share that research here.

I'm so grateful to Michael, Scott, and Jenner for embarking on this creative challenge as we all sort out what HOME has meant and what it develops into as time passes.

Comments...

Hi, Dear Readers!

For some silly reason, I can't respond to your comments, so I'll be posting here with a link to your original comments and the post. ::fist shake::

From Michael's Comments on HOMEostasis:

Hi, Michael! Thanks for writing and reading! Yes... so many thoughts, ideas, studies, and research circling around. I find it interesting that you mention hunter/gather groups because they don't identify with a place, rather a state of being. In looking at home, we're wondering asking this question of ourselves, especially because our current world/ career/ life trends tend to be pretty mobile, or at least fluid. I look forward to continued conversations! ~JCWK

Discovering HOME

What does HOME mean to you?

Is it a place?

Is it a feeling?

Is is a person or people?

Could we experience HOME in our body? What does that look like? What does that mean?

Is HOME the earth? Our community? A building? A spiritual experience? and/or something else?

What are some of the positive connotations of HOME?

What are some negative connotations of HOME?

What does it mean and what does it take to address both these positive and negative aspects?

What makes HOME joyful?

What makes HOME a challenge?

What does it mean/ look like/ feel like to move away from and return to a HOME?

............. How do you, dear Reader, respond to these questions? What movements does your body make as you reflect? Please feel free to include your thoughts in the comments!

.........

Over the past four months, I've been deep into the research process of these questions with four other dance artists. In addition, we've been asking:

How do we, as dancers, experience HOME in our bodies?

How do we, as people who work with other bodies as educators and healers, hear and observe how other people manifest HOME in their bodies - or not?

What can we learn about looking at how we define HOME? What can we learn from the ways we are drawn to or repelled by certain notions of HOME? How does digging into and sharing our stories about HOME provide more information about us and the way we interact with the world?

How does this process and our ideas about HOME change as we gain more information during this research?

What are your thoughts?

Stay tuned for our results!

And, if you'd like to see the performance live, you can get tickets here. 

......

As part of our conversations during our studio research, we often come back to the idea that the body is a microcosm of the universe. In this case, our body is our physical home in the greater home of our communities, environments, world, and cosmos.

Included below is are some visual reflections that Sarena, one of the dance artists, found and shared.

Original source unknown

The WOW happening NOW

Happy 4th of July!

Today is always bittersweet.

Today, I celebrate my anniversary.

Today, the country celebrates her independence.

Today, we as citizens of the United States, celebrate our freedoms to disagree, challenge, and question without persecution. (or do we...?)

......

Today, I read stories about children and adults put into challenging situations because of their hopes and dreams for a better life.

Today, I watch demonstrations of material power.

Today, I remember an embodied collective of joy and love.

......

Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood is modeled after the famed Mr. Rodger's show. In one particular episode, Daniel is reminded (and reminds those watching) to "Enjoy the WOW that's happening NOW."

We watched that episode today.

And as I watch my wedding video - and the news feeds, I can't help but hear Daniel's, and Ms. Tiger's voices ringing in my head, singing, "Enjoy the WOW that's happening NOW!".

The NOW of the moment of my wedding.

The NOW of the folks who are in my wedding video but are no longer physically present.

The NOW of the possibilities of many years ago and the NOW that exists in this moment (both personally and nationally).

The WOW of memories that have been captured in this video. And the WOW of the memories that I can only hold in my heart.

......

In 2016 I began the process of exploring Grief in LEFT BEHIND.

I don't think that I'll ever understand this phenomenon, no matter how many different ways I embody and experience it. But, in this post, I feel it's important to acknowledge that there's a WOW in reflecting on the NOW.

The WOW is painful and heartbreaking and capable of collapsing the human form. And yet, that WOW withstands the impossible pain of loss and grief.

The WOW is in the resilience of the human form to keep moving in face of the unbearable.

Enjoy the WOW that's happening NOW.

Damn...!

.... Happy 4th.

Thank you to those who have served (including our/ your families) and those who continue to serve, in whatever form that manifests.

and...in the words of Daniel Tiger, "Ugga mugga....!"

HOMEostasis

Homeostasis (hoe-mee-oh-say-sis):
Noun.
1. "The tendency of a system, especially the physiological system of higher animals, to maintain internal stability, owing to the coordinated response of its parts to any situation or stimulus that would tend to disturb its normal condition or function.
2. (from psychology) a state of psychological equilibrium obtained when tension or a drive has been reduced or eliminated.
3. (from entomology) the ability of members of a colony of social insects to behave cooperatively to produce a desired result, as when bees coordinate the fanning of their wings to cool the hive."
~from dictionary.com

or, from dance artist and Doctor of Physical Therapy Laura Baehr, "it's the constant shifting that our bodies are doing to maintain a sense of normalcy. That normalcy is never stable and the parts that work to keep a sense of stability are in constant flux and change. We have this illusion of stability in our bodies (and in our lives) that there is a constant, almost flat line "normal" but in fact, from a medical perspective (and a dance perspective, and a mental health perspective), we're constantly making negotiations to maintain that sense of equilibrium."

..........

We're in the process of unfolding what HOME means.

Is it a place?

How do we as dancers experience it in our bodies?

How do we as people who work with other bodies, as educators and healers, hear how other people manifest HOME in their bodies - or not?

What can we learn about looking at how we define HOME and how we are drawn to or repulsed by certain notions of HOME? How does digging into and sharing our HOMES provide more information about us and the way we interact with our world?

..........

As in the case of homeostasis.

..........

Language is interesting. The latin "Homeo" means "like or similar to". But, HOME can be very complicated.

Stay tuned as we negotiate our own way of maintaining a sense of stability in this journey.

Butterflies

Have you ever had butterflies in your stomach?

Not just the "am I nervous or could this be calmed with a digestive supplement?" butterflies.

I mean the "I really should cancel everything and spend the day in the bathroom throwing up" butterflies.

Because of nerves... (which is a real thing).

Me too.

I had a mentor tell me once that we get nervous because it (whatever it is) matters to us.

...

On this particular day, I was invited to present some of my research in conjunction with other scholars and academics as part of a professional symposium. I wasn't the only artist, but I was the only dancer.

And so often, as I dancer I hear things like:
"I don't get dance"
"It's cool to watch, but I could never do it"
"I had a really bad experience with dance when I was growing up"
"Um... I don't really have a great relationship with my body..."

I especially hear this in places outside of Philly and NYC (which maybe have more exposure to different types of dance or movement experiences? I have a strong tendency to doubt this, but I'm still doing research on dance in rural settings).

But, I also choose to be in these (not Philly or NYC) places and spaces because I believe in the power of dance to empower individuals to engage creatively and physically.

Dance is important.

So, on this particular day, when I wanted to hide under my covers, I still went to my class. I asked my class to hold space for me as I shared my fears of being judged and of not being enough. Of putting my headspace and heartspace on display through my bodyspace. I told my students that I was afraid of not being understood, or of being ridiculed because of what I looked like or what I presented.

But, I told them, it's because of my own fears that I really, really need to do this presentation/ performance. It's because I don't have the "perfect" body that I need to allow my body to be seen. It's because I'm afraid of being vulnerable that I need to put that vulnerability on display. There's power in being true to oneself and power in being authentic. There's power in the female form - whatever that looks like. There's power in taking ownership of one's voice, whatever shape that voice takes.

And it was because I was so scared of all of these elements that I needed to share this experience -because I'm probably not the only one. But I might be the only one to speak up.

And... that's exactly what my students said.

"Wow... I'm totally scared to do this solo that you assigned to us, and exactly because of all the things you just said. But I never thought you'd be scared. I'm terrified. I don't want to do this. But I do want to say something... and hearing you say that you're scared too makes me feel not too alone"

And...

"Dance is the only place where I feel comfortable - as myself and in my body. This class and this work is so important"

And...

"You tell us everyday that you trust us to trust ourselves. I trust that you'll be awesome! I trust you!"

And, a message later in the day...

"Thinking of you and your performance. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks! How did you think it went?"

....

Do you know that story about how the flap of a butterfly's wings in one part of the world can cause a hurricane halfway around the world? Yeah... I totally believe that too...