digging out and into into vulnerability

This weekend the weather provided the East Coast with "The Blizzard of the Century". Albeit, the Century isn't that far into her progression, but "Jonas" was a doozy and shut down the Mid-Atlantic  - from DC to NYC - for Saturday and most of Sunday.

As I'm preparing for KYL/D's upcoming performances, NGCB's upcoming performances, and the presentation of my own work, the metaphor of "digging out" is not lost on me.

Katherine Kiefer Stark in (in)visible veins. Original photo by Bicking Photography

Over the past few weeks, I've noticed a sort of "digging out" of myself and past habits that are scary and vulnerable. I described the feeling to a good friend as shedding several layers of skin, but never actually molting out of them. A snake (and a horseshoe crab...) will grow within their old skin and eventually molt that skin, moving out of it and leaving it behind. During that initial time, they are vulnerable, but eventually their new skin hardens and with time and growth, they will molt again.

(Embed this metaphor with the digging out of snow... comments welcomed and encouraged! Digging out of trenches, life, unexpected circumstances, things out of our control...)

I know that I've grown in the past few years, but I don't feel as if I've completely let go. In the past few weeks, I've felt as though some of my several layers of too-small-skin have been molting off in unpleasant chunks, leaving parts of me vulnerable and others well protected. (I envision an iceberg, but also a warrior princess of sorts with parts falling off and others becoming strong. Doesn't some culture have a myth for this process of which I'm not aware?)

I've been able to process this through my analytical-brain, but not through my body-brain, just yet. Perhaps, there's a majority of me still trying to molt and heal.

What does my body-brain look like and how do I know that she's not molting? Or, that she is?

I identify my body-brain as the dancing body that shouldn't "think" or get stuck in the analytical process. My body-brain is the part that demands I move. My body-brain is the part that understands and empathizes when I need (or I advise a friend or student) to move away from the computer screen and into the gym or studio. Personally, I need to take a class or go for a walk or do a workout or roll out with a tennis ball or a foam roller when I feel my analytical-brain taking over my body-brain.

My body-brain knows when my analytical-brain needs a break; my body brain can process from a lived experience, from an empathetic perspective.

My analytical-brain often asks, "what does the research suggest to 'fix' this"? My body-brain often (craves) asks(ing), instead, "How can I move around and with this? How can this experience make me stronger and more flexible?"

My body-brain often knows that nothing needs "fixing". I, and the situation need only time, patience, and embodiment. (My analytical brain recognizes this as part of the human experience, but she also wants to quantify it, somehow).

And herein lies the process of embodying vulnerability.

Over the past few years, I've noticed that I habitually tighten my chest. Physiologically, socially, and anthropologically the protection of the chest/ heart is a normal reaction to feeling threatened.

I've noticed that I don't initiate from my upper torso/ heart center, often, when I'm dancing and improvising. I thought this was something I could move through over time. Further research demonstrated that I was protecting my heart as a way to protect my own vulnerability.

I've been losing chunks of my molts over the past few months and I can see the difference in my artistry, both as a performer and as a creator. I witness the moments when I am willing to be vulnerable and when I shut off and rely on aspects I've developed as "strengths" - technique, physical strength, awareness, sensitivity to others... (but not always to myself).

As the Universe often does, It's pointed me in a direction of finding answers.

I encourage you to watch Brene Brown's Ted Talk.

It's not a step-by-step guide to harnessing the power in vulnerability. But, Brown's witness gave me some courage.

What are some reflections on your own journey?

Reflections long time a'comin'... (or On Trust)

Hi Friends....!

Thanks for staying tuned...

It's been an exciting few weeks... and for whom hasn't it?

Happy Hanukkah! Merry Christmas! Best wishes for Kwanzaa! Happy Solstice...

Darker days allow for longer periods of reflection because we are not consumed by active periods of light.

Some of my darker days have been spent working, artistically.

Some of my darker days have been spent brooding, emotionally.

And now, I'm taking time to reflect, publically.

What has your December Journey entailed?

Backup...

In the beginning of November,  KYL/D traveled to Grand Valley State University in Michigan for a collaborative performance. We (Kun-Yang Lin and his dancers) have been working/ researching/ investigating this work since March, 2015. The journey was a collaboration between Kun-Yang Lin's creative process through KYL/D and the Grand Valley State University's New Music Ensemble's creative process through alumni composer Dan Rhode.

The Grand Valley State entourage was beyond what I could have expected! The University facilities were beautiful! The collaborators was super dedicated to the artistic process and we were welcomed as family. And the performance was comfortable and flawless, from a performers' perspective.

'Have you ever experienced unconditional trust?' a new friend asked, specifically referring to performance.

Trust in the work. Trust in the process. Trust in my body. Trust in fellow performers. Trust that everyone involved is going to do their absolute best to make the job happen. Trust in the creation of magic.

I never thought about trust as a crucial aspect of performance, in the way that she asked, but it is. Trusting that everything is going to go as it should and trusting that everyone will be able to recover if something goes wrong is as thrilling as the live performance itself. I've written before that dance and live performance is magic because it is the ultimate "in the moment" experience. There's no second shot and there's no "take two". Everyone involved, including the audience, has to be completely in the moment. There's trust in that.

Fast forward two weeks and KYL/D is performing "HOME/ S. 9th St." at FringeArts. I haven't written much about the HOME performance because I was so excited to be in the moment. The work is timely and is timeless. It's pushed me as a person and as an artist. Kun-Yang asked me to say things and become a character I didn't know and wasn't sure that I could know. But he trusted that I could do it, and he trusted the other dancers that we could bring his vision to light. His trust empowered me. He trusted that this story of trials, failure, questioning, doubt, fear, challenge, assimilation, humiliation, integration, individualization, building-rebuilding-and-rebuilding needed to be shared by us at this time. And, in bringing all of these elements and more into one performance, he/ we was/were trusting the audience to take that journey with us. And many of them did. Through HOME, I gained new insight into ideas of community building, national identity, and trust. I have so much more to continue to process from this experience, but I trust that HOME will have a long life, and I hope you have the opportunity to experience the work, yourself.

The earth continues to turn...

Happy Thanksgiving! I visited family in Texas. Again, lessons of trust revealed themselves. I rediscovered the deep comfort of family, even in times of external turmoil. Trust - as a virtue of unconditional love - was again demonstrated to me; this time, not on stage, but in acceptance in family.

(I realize I'm being a bit vague. Honestly, it's taking a lot to sit down and write. In this period of limited sun, I want to hibernate and burrow under the covers until the sun shines longer than the foggy darkness or turn on all of the lights and run around and never sleep. Neither side is winning, Every time in the past few weeks I opened up a page to write, I closed my computer. So, this post  is also an act of trust. Trust that there is purpose in continuing an imperfect process. Trust in the act of showing up. Trust in the practice.)

A few more days shortening into nights... Widener University has their Fall/ Winter Concert. My students have been working hard and we've molded the semester around the Booker T. Washington quote "There are two ways of exerting one's strength: one is pushing down, the other is pulling up." This can be applied in a very real way to dance practice - in balance, in stretching, in strengthening, in weight sharing; but can also reflect how we chose to act as people. If you're reading my blog, you're familiar with my philosophy that our dancing lives and dancing bodies are no different from our every-day lives and bodies. We are interconnected. This semester, my students and the work we created particularly seemed to understand and trust this. Trust the strength they were building in technique classes. Trust the community they were building in class. Trust the challenges with which they were presented and their ability to rise to them. And trust that dance can be many different things all at the same time.

It might sound strange to "trust a work" but that surrender is an ultimate part of the creative process.  

My December Journey continues...

I began two new works of my own, with the trust of two very special dancers. This project - working title HomeFrontLines - has been stewing for about a year, but I've needed to trust myself in order to take the beginning steps. HomeFrontLines is a big project, at least in my mind, and one that I trust needs a voice. I am grateful to Melissa and Katherine with whom I have shared many ideas and elements of this journey over the past year. They've also pushed me to begin rehearsals. I finally trusted myself to do so. We've been in the studio dancing, thinking, talking, sharing, moving, and I've been doing a ton of my own research. I'm excited and terrified for the process. We'll be sharing some of the work at the annual Evening of Duets in February.

If you follow KYL/D on Facebook or Twitter, you'll be familiar with a practice called "Mindful Monday". I see it as a moment in the beginning of the week to check in with one's self through a quote that is not only reflective, but is also mindful, aware and intentional of the time at hand (socially, politically, locally, worldly...).

Here's the Mindful Monday for this week - the end of 2015 and the beginning of 2016:

Photo by Bicking Photography of KYL/D's "HOME/ S. 9th St." 

Thanks for trusting me and taking the time to read my blog. Thanks for letting me trust you, as readers!

I aim to carry the wisdom of trust into the new year. What wisdom did you gain from 2015?

National Dance Day 2015

Every day should be National Dance Day. For me, it is!

National Dance Day is July 25th and was officially named by the Dizzy Feet Foundation.

"Dizzy Feet Foundation was founded in 2009 by producer Nigel Lythgoe and director Adam Shankman, among others, to support, improve and increase access to dance education in the United States" ~from the Dizzy Feet Foundation website

Across the country, dance communities celebrate this day with performances, classes, and dance-related excitement.

This post is a day late because I was performing in the 3rd Annual Come Together Dance Festival, presented by the Koresh Dance Company.

This year, I had the honor of performing with Kun-Yang Lin/Dancers. I love Come Together because:
1. Dancers in the Philly area are so busy! We are often rehearsing and performing with our own projects and don't get to see the work of other artists! (Not to mention that we can't always afford tickets).
2. Time to share! Share each others' work! Share ideas and conversation between call and the performance! Share thoughts and feedback during the performance! Share new friends, dancers and choreographers!
3. Community! or ComeUnity! Come Together featured break dancers, modern dancers, ballet dancers, tap dancers, and traditional Indian dancers. There were dances in bear feet, socks, ballet flats, pointe shoes, tap shoes, and sneakers. Dances with unique and beautiful costumes (extravagant and minimal), lighting, and props. Dancers of every shape, size, color, background, and makeup. And the backstage area where everyone is waiting to perform is full of support! The hallway fills with applause as the last performing group enters from off stage and shouts of "Merde!" to the company heading on stage.
4. The Suzanne Roberts Theatre is beautiful! The stage is a nice floor on which to dance, the audience is a great size, the lighting and production capacities are beautiful! And Koresh always has a sweet team of professionals working the technical end and capturing the moments of the performance.
5. I am reminded of how lucky I am to be a professional dancer. This is a challenging vocation, but I am grateful to know that so many others share my drive, dream, and passion. (And challenges and shortcomings). Each of us, in our own way, figures out how to make that dream survive.
6. Dance brings people together. All of the performances had full audiences! Not only did we get to share with other artists, backstage, but with a full house (over 400 people) every night. Dance is powerful and transformative. It creates joy.

Koresh needs some help to make sure that Come Together is complete - even after the final performers take their bows. Their Indiegogo campaign is open for a few more days. Please help keep Dance in Philly alive: Come Together Indiegogo Campaign

KYL/D performing at Koresh's Come Together. Photo by Bicking Photography
(I'm in the green socks).

Thank you! Thank you, Koresh! Thank you, KYL/D! Thank you Bicking Photography! Thank you dance artists! Thank you to all of the audience members and supporters! It was an honor to share the stage with you and perform for you!

The Protected - more questions

For the Dance Journal, Gregory King wrote, "Athletic and nuanced in its presentation, The Protected revealed King in positions of defiance and strength when she stood in an open stance with her chest listed and arms raised above her head and bent at the elbows. She was unapologetic in her demeanor as she overpowered the space with her deliberate musculature. King danced fearlessly..."

Read the whole review here: Artists at Home

A "performance" is like a "publication". What is shown (through the stage or through text) is fully developed, thought out, and researched. But the action of "putting it out there" (read: the work for performance and/or publication) also proves to be influential in the choreographer's/ author's research.

Because the creative process is organic, it's never "really" finished.
~Should the work be left to gestate, it might produce different results.
~Should the audience experience the work at a different time or place, he/she/they might have different interpretations of the work, based upon his/her/their lived experiences and what they bring to the work.
~What would happen if the creator could re-visit the work:
       ~ with his/her new lived and researched experiences?
        ~ with feedback from other professionals in the field?
         ~ with feedback from audiences who are not experienced in the field?

How do lived experiences change with time? How do the memories of lived experiences change with time?

A moment from "The Protected" caught by Bill Hebert. 

The Protected - a new work

I sit in the lobby of CHI MAC with one of my dancers as she's preparing to run to another engagement after our showing/ rehearsal. She, also, exists under the space of wearing many different hats (costumes?).

"I'm so sorry I can't stay to see your piece," she apologizes as if she needs to. (I choose my dancers precisely BECAUSE of who they are and the stories their bodies contain. Despite the technique or the direction that I might give them as a choreographer, these stories always will bleed through onto the stage and into the creative process. I invite them to.)

Then comes the hard question.

"What is is about?"

Gulp.

I smile. I look away from her supportive gaze. I look at the floor. I look out the window. I take a deep breath. A moment to procrastinate as I gather the truth - no, as I gather the courage to say the truth.

"It's about being on the other side of the military."

*  *  *  *  *

As I write, I don't know what more to say. As I cannot understand that challenges that our veterans and current military experience on a day-to-day basis, I don't expect anyone to fully understand what it means to be on the other side of that (insert word here - experience? trauma? loss? pain? lifestyle? culture?).

Dance is abstract and I don't expect that my audience will see what the work is "about," but feedback from showings suggests that something about the feeling is being communicated.

"Fear?"

"I see you as a very protective person. In this, it looks like you're struggling. Who protects the protector?"

"From what is 'the protected' being protected? Or are they?"

May through September at Sunset Beach in Cape May, NJ,
the flag that draped the coffin of a veteran is flown.
This is the flag that draped my grandfather's coffin.
Thank you, to all those who serve.
Sunset Beach flag Ceremony

KYL/D's Building HOME: Deconstructing HOME

KYL/D has been working on "Home: S 9th St." for several months now. As part of the process, I've participated as an artist in several research and community based events: KYL/D's Open Dialogs, Story Circles inspired by the practices of Cornerstone Theatre, and impromptu story telling about family, safety, and what it means to be "home".

Over the course of the next few weekends, KYL/D will be sharing more of the process of "Home: S 9th St". But, I'm honored that they're also opening up the process to showing us, their artists, in a different light. We will be performing the work of Artistic Director Kun-Yang Lin as part of KYL/D's Deconstructing HOME on May 14th-16th at the CHI Movement Art's Center, KYL/D's actual "home space". This upcoming week (May 7th-9th), KYL/D will be presenting the creative work of the company's artists. In addition to being performers and active in that course of creative investigation, each of us are also creators, choreographers, educators, and exist in the roles of friend, lover, daughter, partner... This weekend is a unique opportunity to really go behind the scenes of the artists, ourselves.

I'm sharing excerpts of (in)visible veins and a new work in which I'm collaborating with long-time friend Jessica Hardinger. More on that forthcoming.

See you next week at CHI MAC! Space is limited, so reserve your tickets: TICKETS for KYL/D's Building HOME and Deconstructing HOME

  

Pics from (in)visible veins

Frank Bicking and his family generously shared their Friday with us. Here are some of the moments he captured from (in)visible veins. Lighting by Matt Sharp.

Katherine Kiefer Stark

Jodi Obeid and Belle Alveraz

Jodi Obeid

Marcie Mamura and Katherine Kiefer Stark

Belle Alveraz and Marcie Mamura

Jodi Obeid

Jodi Obeid and Belle Alveraz

KC Chun-Manning, Marcie Mamura, and Katherine Kiefer Stark

KC Chun-Manning

KC Chun-Manning, Marcie Mamura, and Belle Alveraz

KC Chun-Manning, Jodi Obeid, and Katherine Kiefer Stark

Press from Unveiled

A giant "Thank You" to everyone who shared Unveiled with us!

We had a full house and are so grateful for all of the support and feedback we've received.

Kat Richter and Bill Hebert shared some of their impressions for The Dance Journal and Kirsten Kaschock wrote a review for thINKingDANCE. Check out some quotes and links to the full articles below.

"...two words came to mind about this choreographic project: taste and invitation. And indeed, throughout the piece, the generosity of the movement and the sometimes careful and more often care-taking focus of the five dancers moved both in- and outwards."

Read more of Kirsten's review: Unveiled: Authorial Intent
Kirsten has a beautiful way of weaving words together and I deeply appreciate her perspective. Thank you for "seeing" the work!


"...'We're not the only women going through transitions. Let's just show this to the world.'..."
Read more of Kat Richter's preview: Preview: Unveiled with Jessica Warchal-King and Brandi Ou
During my interview with Kat, she asked some challenging questions. Thank you, Kat for capturing the essence of the performance!


"Sometimes it's important to see things from a different perspective."
Read and see more of Bill Hebert's Behind the Lens article: A Lesson and then a look at Unveiled from a different perspective
I'm so grateful that Bill felt empowered to play with his craft during the performance! I think so much of this research has been about discovering and listening to new perspectives.


 

Behind the Scenes with KYL/D

KYL/D regularly hosts Open Dialogs for the community to get a peek into the process, ask questions and converse with the artists and Artistic Director Kun-Yang Lin's collaborators, and see some of the work.

I'm excited to share this process today! Please join us at 4pm at the CHI Movement Arts Center, home of Kun-Yang Lin/Dancers. Check out the website: Kun-Yang Lin/Dancers

HOME/S.9th St. Work in Progress 3 from Kun-Yang Lin/Dancers on Vimeo.

"Unveiled" Updates - Brandi Ou

Thank you, Brandi.

It's important for me to take a moment and publicly thank Brandi for this challenge. She approached me with this challenge in early 2015. A new year? Our own work? (insert much conversation and some external encouragement from other family and friends...) Okay....!

Brandi and I have known each other for about five years. As a dancer, one creates a unique bond with another dancer.

In all honesty, anyone who spends five years moving, creating, and trying to be honest in artistic practice with another person for five years develops a special relationship.

Brandi and I connected quickly and she saw through my external performances to the truth in my heart. She always challenged me not to be so protective of myself and begged me to answer the questions that I didn't know how to ask. She wasn't always sure how to ask them, either, but she knew that the questions existed.

"A dream is an answer to a question you have not yet learned how to ask" ~unknown

One of those dreams and not-yet-learned questions was this performance.

I have learned so much about myself as a leader, a creator, an educator, and as someone who feels called to create beauty where there is so much destruction in our world.

I have been challenged in my patience, in my acceptance, in my aesthetic, in my self-belief and self-worth, in asking for help, and in knowing when I've reached my limits - but have still been encouraged to find the ability to take one more step.

I've failed and tried again. and again. and again.

I've learned that there are many people who love me and that I love. I've learned that accepting that unconditional exchange is scary, but rewarding and ultimately safe.

Brandi spear-headed our Hatchfund campaign (we divided the work of producing this show) and describes herself as "a hard-working woman who loves to love and gives my heart to everything I do 110%". I agree.

Brandi's showing her work, Not All Who Wander Are Lost alongside my work (in)visible veins on Friday as part of Unveiled.

For tickets: The Dance Box Office

Brandi in my work Embedded Layers. Photo by Bill Hebert. 

Behind the scenes of "(in)visible veins"

Artist Kaitlin Chow stopped by my rehearsal at the Performance Garage and graciously shared her time and perspective of (in)visible veins through her lens (literally).

Thank you, Kaitlin! Check out more of her work, check out: KChow Studios

Performers: Jodi Obeid, Marcie Mamura, KC Chun-Manning, Belle Alveraz, Katherine Kiefer Stark

Get your tickets for the performance: Dance Box Office

"(in)visible veins" - Who's Who in the Cast

My dancers are vital to this work.

I want you to know a bit about how incredible they are, before you see them on Friday. They're amazing women, artists, thinkers, feelers, dreamers, citizens, and inspirations for me. So, in alphabetical order and in motion, here are their "professional" bios. But, there's so much more to them then the pictures (although these are beautiful, thank you KChow Studios!) and the words. You'll just have to see them dance!


Belle Alvarez is originally from Tegucigalpa, Honduras. She spent the first half of her childhood in Manila, Philippines before immigrating to the USA. Belle is a Dance Artist currently based in Philadelphia. She is a Teaching Artist with award-winning Pierre Dulaine's Dancing Classrooms and an Apprentice Instructor with Koresh Dance Company's School Outreach Program. In 2014, she earned her BFA in Dance Performance and Choreography from Temple University. During her undergraduate years, she performed in work by Jillian Harris, Colleen Hooper Performance Projects, Dance Exchange, Charles O. Anderson/ Dance Theatre X, Larry Keigwin, and Beau Hancock. Belle's early training includes the Lehigh Valley Charter High School for the Performing Arts, where she studied under the direction of Kim Maniscalco, Amy Lawrence, and Jennifer Dite-Weaver. Belle has presented work since 2009 in venues located in Bethlehem, PA, Philadelphia, Quite, Ecuador, and Auckland, New Zealand. For more info on Belle, check out her website: Belle Alvarez

KC Chun-Manning received her MFA in Dance from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, while simultaneously completing her certification at The Alexander Technique Center Urbana with master teachers, Joan and Alex Murray. Her Philly-based teaching has ranged from teaching Dance for Parkinson's Disease and for the Cancer Support Community Philadelphia, to coaching gymnastics at Philly InMovement. She has served on the Dance faculty at Temple and Drexel Universities and as an Alexander Teacher for the Pig Iron School for Advanced Performance Training. Beyond Philly, she has been a guest artist at West Chester University, Trinity College, Denver University, Bucknell University, and for breast-feeding moms at the North Suburban Hospital in Thorton, Colorado. KC is the Artistic Director of Fresh Blood, which has presented choreography regionally and in Colorado and NYC. She has also collaborated with Pasion y Arte Flamenco and Olive Prince Dance. KC has performed for many artists such as Susan Rethhorst, Guillermo Ortega Tanus, Carolyn Merritt, kim olson/ sweet edge, Maedee Dupres, Sara Hook, Jennifer Schmermund, and Cynthia Oliver. For more info on KC, check out her website: KC Chun-Manning



Katherine Kiefer Stark is a Philadelphia-based dance artist, teacher, and artistic director and founder of The Naked Stark. Katherine received her MFA in choreography from the University of North Carolina, Greensboro and her BA in dance from Connecticut College. Her work has been presented in New York, North Carolina, West Virginia, and New Hampshire, as well as produced by a variety of presenters in Philadelphia including FringeArts, Mascher Space Cooperative, Hybridge Arts Collective, University City District's Programming at the Porch, and First Person Arts. In 2012, she received a FringeArts JumpStart grant and a Rocky Award, a peer-to-peer award for outstanding achievement in the Greater Philadelphia dance community. Katherine has also performed with Eleanor Goudie-Averill/Stone Depot Dance Lab, Colleen Hooper, Jodi Obeid, and Guillermo Ortega Tanus among others, as well as collaborating with Loren Groenendaal and Marion Ramirez. Katherine has taught as a guest artist at Muhlenberg College, University of Texas, El Paso, Widener University, and Enloe High School. She has also been adjunct faculty at Bryn Mawr College and Mascher Space Cooperative, where she is currently an Artist-in-Residence. For more info on Katherine, check out her website: The Naked Stark



Marcie Mamura is an artist, educator, and collaborator from Sioux City, Iowa. She earned a BA in Theatre with Dance emphasis from Kansas State University and a MFA in Dance from the University of Oregon where she held a Graduate Teaching Fellowship. Marcie's work as a teaching artist in Philadelphia communities includes Girard College-Dream Camp, Asian Arts Initiative, KYL/D's CHI Movement Arts Center, Montgomery County Community College, and Drexel University. As a freelance artist, she's performed works by artists Mina Estrada, Gabrielle Revlock, and Nicole Bindler. Her work has been presented in the InHale Performance Series, the Philly Fringe Festival, TRANSForm Dance Collective Concerts (Charlotte, Minneapolis/St. Paul), Dance Chance 2013, and Creative Nests: Welcome to Our World, Vol II (Chicago). She is a founding member of TRANSForm Dance Collective. Marcie is wildly curious about community practices and artful exchange. For more about Marcie's work  check out: TRANSForm Dance Collective

Jodi Obeid is a choreographer, performance artist, and dance educator. Jodi is obsessed with the study of movement of all kinds. Her work concentrates on the investigation of movement for movement itself and on the quirky pitfalls of human nature. Since her arrival in Philadelphia, Jodi has produced work at the Painted Bride Theater, for the Mascher Space IN FLUX Series, the CEC New Edge Mix, Glue Series and in collaboration with Stadium/ Praxis - a puppet theater. Jodi has guest choreographed in the area at West Chester and Rowan Universities and taught for the Mascher Space COSMOS master class series and KYL/D CHI Artists Summer Workshops. A serious globetrotter, her work was presented in Washington DC, Toronto, North Carolina, and in Belgium at various festivals. As a performing artist, Jodi has worked with Kosoko Performance Group, Ring Dance Theater, PDP Philadelphia Local Dance History Project., anonymous bodies, SCRAP Performance Group, and many other independent artists. She earned her MA in Dance Education from the American University and her BA in French and Dance from Goucher College and the Sorbonne University in Paris.


All photos are by Kaitlin Chow - KChow Studios - and are from rehearsal for (in)visible veins. 
For tickets: Dance Box Office

FAQ's about "Unveiled" Friday, April 17th

A few things you should know if you're coming to the show:

1. What's going on? Unveiled is a shared performance between me and Brandi Ou. It's at The Performance Garage in Philadelphia. The address is 1515 Brandywine Street, Philadelphia, PA 19130. It's located between Spring Garden & Green Streets and 15th and 16th Streets. Brandywine Street is a one-way street.

2. How do I get there? Where do I park? What can I do if I come early? The Performance Garage has listed that information here: Visiting The Performance Garage. There is free, on-street parking and a paid-lot option. I recommend that you plan to come early, though, just in case. Public transit, traffic, and parking can be a challenge on a Friday evening in Philly.

3. What time does the show start? The show begins at 8pm. The house will open 20-30 minutes before the show.

4. Is there assigned seating? Nope! Please come early to pick your seat! The house will open 20-30 minutes before the performance.

5. I bought my ticket online. Where is it? Thank you! You can pick up your ticket at the door when you come to the performance. It will be waiting for you. Please give your name at the desk.

6. I didn't buy my ticket online. Should I? The Performance Garage has sold out many of its shows this season, in advance! Please purchase your tickets early: Dance Box Office.

7. Oh no! I didn't get my ticket yet and the Box Office says there are no more available! The online Box Office closes 24 hrs before the show. If you don't get your tickets online, you can get tickets at the door, provided there is space available. Please come early to get your ticket.

8. This is really awesome! Can I take pictures or video with my phone? Nope! To protect the safety of the performers and the rights of the artists, no video or photography is allowed. Please contact me or Brandi if you're interested in learning more about the work or read the other updates on my blog!

9. How long is the show? Approximately 60 minutes. There is no intermission.

10. I have to pee. There is no intermission. Please take care of any personal needs before or after the show.

11. Wow! What a show! What's next? Please join us immediately after the performance at Bourbon & Branch on 705 N 2nd St.

12. No, really, what's next for Unveiled? We'd love to share this work with a larger audience, especially those who supported us, but couldn't make this performance. Our goals include another Philadelphia performance and a Mid-West Tour. Additionally, we're open to other venues and developing relationships with like-minded organizations. If you'd like to help make this possible, please make a donation at the performance or contact me or Brandi. (jcwarchalking@gmail.com)

Thanks so much for your support! We look forward to seeing you!

The Artist's Defeating Self Talk

If you hang out with me on other social media sites, you know I'm a sucker for good quotes and inspirational words of wisdom. I don't post too many to this blog because I feel as though I've already filled up my social media quota through Facebook and Pinterest. (@jcwarchalking - check out my Pinterest pages for more creative research).

But, this article, 15 Things You Should Give Up to be Happy, popped up in my feed and number 4 was particularly pounding at this point in my creative process.

"4. Give Up Your Self-Defeating Self-Talk".

(Read the article to get the rest, including some useful tips for "How to"!)

My "Self-Defeating Self-Talk" includes:

•  the moments of panic during rehearsal when I want to say, "um.. yeah... let's just forget this whole thing. You're totally great but... We can just cancel the show and move on with our lives."
• the moments when my (very carefully chosen) collaborators ask for more information or clarification or provide feedback. "This costume feels strange to dance in." "The program description might be shorter." "What about the visual effect?" "What is the intention with that moment, this work, these images?" Answer: moment of panic. I don't know. Reality = these very carefully chosen collaborators are asking because they're invested in helping me through this process. The questions aren't asked with criticism but curiosity and a challenge for me to investigate them. But I still panic when I don't have the answers. 
• the moments when the work, itself, challenges my own perceptions of myself - my values, my aesthetic, and my goals. I'm not prepared to write too much more in this post, other than that these moments cause me to revisit and reflect and repeat familiar processes with new information to see if I'm making the right choice for the work and my creative spirit.
• Why do I do this to myself? The panic days, weeks, moments before the show. The hours of physical and intellectual research on my own. The hours of research in the studio. The marketing. The asking for financial and in-kind support. The asking for emotional support. The questioning of artistic choices. The self-doubt and "if only's".
• The if only's - I had more time. I had more funding. I could hire a costume designer. I could collaborate with a lighting designer. I could do more physical research. I could do more intellectual and emotional research. I could book more opportunities for performance research...   

And yet...

I did choose this challenge - to produce my first professional, shared-evening, dance concert.
I asked my collaborators to provide their feedback.
I need the work to challenge my aesthetic values.
I sought financial, in-kind, and emotional support.
I have done extensive physical, intellectual, and emotional research.

But I still worry.

Reality check and giving up my own self-defeating self-talk: A large part of "Unveiled" is participating in a very vulnerable, uncomfortably honest process. I need to trust that even if that is my only success, I fully participated in that work.

On another note, I'm reassured by the conversations that I have with other artists that I admire and who are looking out for me during this time. "How are you doing," they ask, fully aware of the answer. "I'm in that uncomfortable place where nothing feels right and I'm questioning everything." 

"Uncomfortable? Isn't that a bit of an understatement?" from an established artist and respected mentor/friend.

Deep sigh on my part - "oh goodness, yes. I'm freaking out!"

My mentor nods, "Yep, that's where you should be right now."

I also find solstice in the many conversations I listen to on NPR where the interviewer asks the artist if they ever get nervous before they read their poem, sing their song, play live, or perform. They most always say that they do feel a sort of nervousness or anxiety before a performance, showing, sharing, reading, or event, but they also understand that nervousness is part of the role of being an artist and sharing work. It's a part of being vulnerable, but also a part of having something to say and holding the responsibility of saying that.

And, in the words of another mentor, "A little nervousness is good. It means you care. When you stop getting nervous, then it's time to move on."

Original photo by Bill Hebert, from microcosmic current, 2010

"Unveiled" Updates - Thank you!

Our Hatchfund fundraiser ended yesterday and we reached beyond our stretch goal!

Wow!

Thank you to everyone who supported us through this endeavor! The Hatchfund was a risk, but a challenge you helped us to overcome! Thank you so much for believing in us!

Original pic by Bill Hebert of KC Chun-Manning in my work "Embedded Layers" 

 And, a thank you to Molly Ray who donated after I had posted this image publicly to Facebook!

Come and see the work and share in the process! Get your tickets: Dance Box Office

Again. and Again. and Again... on Repetition.

"It's like when you look at the ocean, and it seems like every wave is the same. But then you move in closer, and you realize that they're all different and constantly changing the landscape," said my student when prompted to reflect on my use of repetition when choreographing.

EXACTLY!

Repetition. It's a tool, in my toolbox, that I use repeatedly.

I repeat, precisely for that previously stated reason.

"It seems the same, but it's all different."

Every time is different. Every time I, we, you seemingly "repeat" something (in dance, in music, in life) time has already changed the original experience. We have new information with which to review the subject matter.

Compositionally, the dancer and the audience have an opportunity to experience the movement again, but differently. What else, besides the dancer and the audience member, has changed in mere moments? Spatially? Musically? In the relationship between the dancers on stage? Within the lighting? (and yes, biologically and psychologically, we are constantly changing.)

(shift)

New questions: Theoretically, why do we revisit familiar patterns?

Emotionally, physically, and psychologically, can we let go of familiar patterns or do we re-enact them to get more information and more understanding?

What do we gain from the re-enactment?

(shift)

Personal story: My parents tell me that, as a child, I needed to verbally recount my day before falling asleep. As an adult, I do spend a lot of time (sometimes too much time?) thinking and reflecting. I'm sure that my obsession with repetition stems from an early point in my life.

I can't help but circle back to check, again.

(shift)

It's like the ocean...

6 Bulletpoints on Bach's No. 6 (and a few more)

In my professional work, I'm committed to using music by artists with whom I'm (at the very least) professionally familiar. It's part commitment to my community, part commitment to sharing the work of other artists, and part logistical in getting permission to use someone else's creativity for public consumption and my own inspiration. (More on permission and legal rights of artists in another post, but, yes they are real. Yes, artists have rights to their creative work, and yes, the internet has made that a bit more challenging.)

David Cullen has been playing in my ear for over ten years now, and I'm still star-struck every time I attend one of his performances. He graciously granted me permission to use his interpretation of Bach's Cello Suite No. 6 for (in)visible veins. Thank you, David! Check out more of his work, his performance schedule, and get some of his music: David Cullen's website

Bach's Cello Suite No 6. was particularly interesting to me because:

1. The very first solo I performed professionally was to one of the movements to one of the Cello Suites. (I was too young to know much more than that and too emotionally effected by the experience to think objectively about the music. But I am so grateful for that opportunity and that solo!)

2. Bach is timeless. Horseshoe crabs are timeless. The female experience is timeless. Dance is timeless. It's an organic gathering in time and space!

3. I didn't recognize No. 6 as one of the more familiar of Bach's Suites. (I'm also hesitant to use familiar music because [a]- Audience members bring their own experiences to the work, including their experiences with music and [b] I prefer to use less familiar music to support and share things that might be overlooked, but that still have importance and relevance).

4. Clear craftsmanship in the composition and the performance!

5. David Cullen played the Suite on the guitar - taking something "created" for one instrument (the Cello) and translating it into a new medium. (Yes, it could be argued that the Suites weren't created for one specific instrument, but it's in the title. And I believe in backing up what one says. They're not called the Trumpet Suites or even the String Suites or even Suites made for Stringed Instruments.)

6. David Cullen is taking a classic structure and a classic vocabulary and giving it contemporary value by putting it in his repertory and on his album "One Night, One Guitar". What's contemporary? By definition, anything that's happening now.

As I do, I did more digging. And I discovered even more reasons why Bach's Cello Suite No. 6 is relevant to (in)visible veins. (Please note, this is not a scholarly paper and these are my - perhaps artistic - interpretations of the research that I uncovered).

1. The Cello Suites weren't meant to be public phenomenon. They were structural and foundational and created for that purpose.

2. The Cello Suites No. 6 are the only suites that use the alto and soprano octaves or "voices" as I read. Alto and Soprano are classically female voice parts. The Cello Suites No. 6 are the only ones that include the female voice!

3. The Suites were written to be cyclical. Like the tides, and life cycles, and story-telling. (So relevant to this research!)

4. Seemingly foundational/ elementary/ simple music structures + seemingly foundational/ elementary/ simple movement structures + seemingly foundational/ elementary/ simple ecological structures + seemingly foundational/ elementary/ simple relationship structures = so much complexity!!! = (in)visible veins

5. Repetition. Repetition. Repetition. In structure and performance. Boring? Perhaps. But repetition provides me (my viewers, dancers, and collaborators) with an opportunity to experience something again, but with more information and a new perspective. Bach has repetition in his Suites. I use repetition in my choreography.

6. The Cello Suites No. 6 were written in D Major. D Major is associated with joy and triumph. (Insert big sigh here.) Joy and Triumph = Community Building. Coming together to share stories. Continuing to do the Hard Work (of creation), despite Advisory and Obstacle.

I'm especially inspired by the idea of "Triumph."

I wonder - what will you feel after the experiencing the work?

Tickets are available: here

Get your tickets at the Dance Box Office.

"Unveiled" - Behind the scenes

I'm interested in the perspectives of the people with whom I work. Their voices contribute to and reflect the intention of the process. Check out some of their thoughts on (in)visible veins:

"Unveiled" Updates - what just happened?

This dance-making stuff is serious business.


Hours in the studio, physically researching.
Hours in conversations and reading, scholarly researching.
Scheduling rehearsals, meetings, performances.
Attending and leading rehearsals and meetings.
Designing and determining the images and text for marketing materials.
Communicating with collaborators.
Fundraising.
Advertising. (How many social media sites popped up yesterday?)
Create. Review. Revise. Repeat.
Create. Review. Revise. Repeat.
Create. Review. Revise. Repeat.
Create. Review. Revise. Repeat.


Until a puppy emerges. Or I sneeze.


In the process of creating our Fundraising video, Brandi and I had a lot of outtakes that we wanted to share with you.


Ultimately, this busi-ness about art making is one that is also about joy creation, community building, and sharing. It's time consuming and challenging, but it's important for me to remember that it's also about something so much larger than myself.


Please laugh with (and at) us!

"Unveiled" Updates - Thank you!

A huge, giant "Thank you" to everyone who's been involved in the process thus far! Rehearsals and research have been in the works for several months, as you know.


Brandi and I launched a fundraising campaign on Hatchfund and that's moving quickly! Thank you!!

Here's the link to our campaign: Unveiled Fundraising